Between generations

Last night I was holding Loucee and she went to sleep on my lap. She can be quite a little snuggler when she's asleep, and I was enjoying the quiet and peace of it. I was kissing her hair and feeling her breathe while I could hear her two brothers and one cousin playing in the back room. They were laughing and enjoying themselves and I found myself smiling at how content having the grandbabies in my home makes me feel. I needed that content feeling, because while two generations down from my own were visiting me, two generations up my grandpa was laying in an intensive care unit. We have been so worried about him, and have had sleepless nights thinking about his pain, his heart, his hip, my grandma, his kids-my mother... Two generations up are struggling. My grandma puts on her brave face, but she has been sleeping alone in her house for one of the first times in literally a half a century. She is a pillar of faith--she KNOWS everything is going to work out fine, no matter what 'fine' is.

On one end of my generations life is just starting. My grandbabies have such a vigor and drive to live, to love, to learn. They are barely aware of the drama unfolding just a few generations up the ladder. They are blessed to know their great-great grandparents, a few might even remember them.

On the other end, hard decisions are being made. There is love, living, and even learning. They have been blessed to know those in generations down from their own, and back to their own parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, great grandparents...

So last night, it occurred to me. I am in the middle.

People everywhere I go ask how my grandparents are. They tell me to pass along their thoughts and prayers to them and their family. They tell me stories about my grandpa as their bishop, or that he sold them a car. Some relate stories of how kind my grandma is, that she was always the first on the scene with food when a family needed help. My grandparents are well loved and have lived well.

Last night I felt more on the aging side of the generations. I wondered if I have lived in a way that people would care if I was sick when I am 90. I wondered if they would have fond memories of me. I wondered how my grandchildren would remember me, as loving and fun? Would they look to me as a pillar of faith and strength?

I know this kind of thing happens in families every day.

I feel like a middle child of generations.

Haiku--an ancient form of Japanese poetry

I am very proud of my students for learning how to write a Haiku. It was a long process, but the end result was worth the effort. I want to share some of the work of my brilliant students. Here goes:


The Grinch
by Ismael
He hated Christmas
He tried to take the tree, food
Now is nice and kind

Grinch
by Savannah
Mean man stole Christmas
His brain is full of spiders
He is a monster!

Grinch
by Kylee
Green, hates Christmas Eve
Stinky, hateful, grouchy, mad
Hearts an empty hole.

Snow
by Jayden
It is cold and wet
Freezing cold and very wet
Crunchy under feet

Grinch
by Jordyn
Green, hates Christmas Day
MEAN, yellow teeth, yellow eyes
Hearts an empty hole.

Santa
by Ismaelia
Santa is good, fun
Chubby and funny and fun
Santa Claus brings toys

Snow
by Easton
White, cool, wet, good fun
Too much drives my mom crazy
So much that she screamed.

Yeah, I pretty much loved that last one.
There are so many Grinch ones because we did our school Christmas program with a Grinchy theme.

Hope you are all staying warm and toasty!
Kathy

Ever just feel...

Happy? I do, right now in fact. This day started out a little bit shaky, but I just feel good inside.

(My alarm didn't go off, and not one person in my house thought it important to wake me. So at 6:50 I jump out of bed, run to the shower, just get out and hear that my dad is outside honking his horn. I did growl.)

Maybe its Michael Crawford singing "O Holy Night," or maybe the smell of banana bread baking. It could be that my new student came back today and brought her cute personality with her--glad she didn't leave that in Gooding. Maybe its that Mark is coming home tonight, and not staying in Burley. Maybe its that Charlie's friend Ryan is here and they are playing games and laughing. Maybe its chicken-bacon-ranch pizza. Could be my new 20.00 tree complete with lights, pinecones, and little berries on the ends.

Whatever it is, I just feel happy.

Its a summy day in the neighborhood!

We are learning regrouping for addition problems. I gave the kids a mid chapter test on Tuesday...yeah, I know, a test the day before Thanksgiving break is NOT a good idea.

Many of the kids forgot how to regroup tens and ones, so they got a redo today.

One of the tests didn't have a name on it so I didn't correct it until today.

One part of the test asked the students to look at an addition problem, tell how tens there are, how many ones, and if they have o regroup. The last box in the table asked for the sum.

There were six problems. In every single box asking for sums, this student had drawn suns.

Maybe it is just funny to me, but I did love it!

New kid on the block

Today I got a new student. I always review the rules of school for the new child, and because it is always good to review.

Rule #5: Follow all school rules.

With a little snow on the ground, I wanted to use the opportunity to remind the students that we don't throw snow or snow balls, or anything made of snow. So I asked the little darlings a VERY leading question: What can't we throw at school. To their credit, one boy replied, "rocks." True, I thought and asked "what else?" Either they didn't know, or they were hoping I meant something else, but they could not get it! Finally the new girl raised her hand. I thought I would give her a shot, so I asked her what she thought we shouldn't throw outside on the playground...in the winter...her reply...

"Temper tantrums." So true, I thought.

We have a new kid in our family. She is a very cute girl who married Jeremy last fall. She is also pretty smart. This could work against us as we try to convince her that getting up at 4:30 A.M. is a fun idea..to go shopping with thousands of other crazy people. We have been working on her for several months, and I think we are getting close to a commitment. Hopefully it will work out, we will see on Friday morning.

Sad news for me. I love all of my students. Some make their way into my heart a little deeper than others. Today one of those kind of students was withdrawn from my class so his family could move to Utah. He cried almost all day. His mom cried. I kind of cried--which to most people is like saying I cried. It breaks my heart what some kids are up against in this world. This kid will climb a mountain all his life.

But at least we all know that we should not under any circumstances throw temper tantrums on the playground!

With all my love and gratitude for each and every one of you who read this--even you Karen--I hope you have a lovely and filling Thanksgiving holiday.

Hello Friends

Please update.

I love you!

Something I have been thinking about

I have become overwhelmed by the amount of suffering I see all around me. Illness, joblessness, hopelessness, lack of time, money, and compassion. Friends who have their marital rugs pulled right out from under them.

A few weeks ago, when one of my friends told me that her husband had come home and announced they were done, I felt the weight of her predicament as I listened to her wonder how this had happened to her.

I know a man who will die because his heart cannot handle the dialysis he has had to have as a result of the heart medicne he has to take to keep from having cardiac arrest. I watch as his wife worries and prays for him and cries for losing her best friend.

I know of a young man who may lose his vision.

I know of many who are jobless because of the economy.

I know of a few who have lost homes.

I know of someone who agonizes over not being married.

I know of many who are perplexed when life does not turn out the way they expect it to. "Even though we do what we are asked, follow the commandments, go to church..."

Last week I was talking to someone about this. I told her that my heart physically hurts for my friends who are having a hard time. She brought up the Atonement.

I cannot even begin to fathom the love our Savior has for us to have already taken these burdens upon himself. That he knows exactly and perfectly the loneliness, the depression, the utter despair, and the feeling of being so bogged down by our adversities. I can't comprehend how he has taken these things upon himself, but I know he has.

I know it isn't even Halloween yet, but I have been feeling so thankful for every blessing I know has come from my loving Father in heaven. I am so grateful to KNOW who I am. That I am not alone. That everything I go through on this earth was part of my own personal plan to show obedience and worthiness to live with Him again. I need to do better. I have to do better. I can't let my Savior suffer for my pains and not do my best.

I am grateful for my family. My husband is my very best friend. My kids and grandkis bring me the greatest joy I have felt in my life. I am grateful for the gospel, and the testimony of it truthfulness. I am grateful for my friends. I have the best friends in the world. I am grateful for my job--thankful I get to do what I love. I am grateful that I can see. That I can hear, and know. I am grateful for good parents who have showed me how to be Christlike and taught me to love my Savior. I am grateful for grandparents. I am grateful for this part of the country I call home. I am grateful for a warm house, good neighbors and security. I am grateful for the Holy Ghost. I love and am thankful for the blessings of the temple. I am thankful for 7 little six year olds in primary. I am grateful for my Savior. I am thankful for His atoning sacrifice. I am grateful I can be forgiven when I am stupid.

I am grateful to be alive in this time, when we are being tried. When we are being asked to prove ourselves in ways no other generation has had to. I am grateful to know I am not alone in this. Not spiritually, socially, or physically.

I AM grateful.